Larkyn. Seattle. "Doing what mass murderers do when there are no masses around."

 

ry-buscus:

Anon: Have you had sex today?

Me: well I played a ranked game that fucked me pretty hard

(Source: rybuscus)

itsabigbiguniverse:

thecutestofthecute:

Australian Cattle Dog/Blue Heeler Appreciation Post

yesssss good to see my babes gettin some love

baby: a- a- a-

parents: oh, the baby's first words!!

baby: a- aaa- al-

parents: apple?? air??

baby: a- al- al-

baby: Alchemy. The science of understanding, deconstructing, and reconstructing matter. However, it is not an all-powerful art; it is impossible to create something out of nothing. If one wishes to obtain something, something of equal value must be given. This is the Law of Equivalent Exchange, the basis of all alchemy. In accordance with this law, there is a taboo among alchemists: human transmutation is strictly forbidden - for what could equal the value of a human soul...?

yougottahaveseoul:

whoreshiip:

Someone spilled their dunkin donuts coffee in the school lobby so this kid got out his dunkin donuts uniform and started directing traffic around it saying things like “Ma’am watch out, this is a DUNKIN DONUTS MATTER”

when a security guard walked up to him to ask what he was doing the kid told him to stand back he was just doing his job

yougottahaveseoul:

whoreshiip:

Someone spilled their dunkin donuts coffee in the school lobby so this kid got out his dunkin donuts uniform and started directing traffic around it saying things like “Ma’am watch out, this is a DUNKIN DONUTS MATTER”

when a security guard walked up to him to ask what he was doing the kid told him to stand back he was just doing his job

(Source: whoreshiiip)

dutchster:

i accidentally spilled monster energy drink in my fish bowl and now my goldfish won’t stop saying “bro” and keeps flexing it’s fins

ashestoashesjc:

I regret nearly everything I did between the ages of birth and however old I was yesterday. 

foxalpha:

falstafff:

i don’t understand why people don’t instantly respond to “what would your dream superpower be” with the ability to manipulate probability.
think about it. what’s the chance someone will drop 1mil in front of me? 0%? let’s make that 100%. what’s the probability i’ll wake up tomorrow and be X gender? 100%. what’s the probability my bathtub is filled with mac and cheese? 100%.

as a casino employee I can confirm this would be terrifying as fuck

friendlysniper-takeo:

Hi dog.
HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT

friendlysniper-takeo:

Hi dog.

HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT HI CAT

(Source: humortrain)

thereisnoblognameonlyzuul:

nurdsite:

My buddy Tom baked a cake for his Argentinian friend to cheer her up after the world cup loss.
…they are no longer friends.

This is beautiful.

thereisnoblognameonlyzuul:

nurdsite:

My buddy Tom baked a cake for his Argentinian friend to cheer her up after the world cup loss.

…they are no longer friends.

This is beautiful.

I feel like a lot of people on tumblr don’t grasp the difference between the way things are and the way things should be.

It’s like they decide how they think things should be and get pissed at the world for not just immediately getting there.